Toddlerisms Take 3

Sometimes I think I need a pocket dictionary to translate the things my toddler daughters say. For instance:

• “Farkley” means sparkly
• “Lurpee” means Slurpee
• “Concreen” means sunscreen

For the third year in a row, I’m covering Toddlerisms. The Urban Dictionary defines Toddlerism as follows: “A child between the ages of 1 to 3 … pushing boundaries and throwing fits.”

Quite fitting because toddlers are like wild animals. You just never know when they’ll strike with a meltdown, or surprise you with total sweetness. While this has been a challenging age with my two oldest daughters, it has been laughable to say the least.

In the first two installments of Toddlerisms, there was a bigger emphasis on my daughter, Charlotte, who is now 5 years old. Don’t get me wrong, she still has some incredibly silly sayings like calling Wawa “Bing Bong.”

Another comical narrative? “I had a stomach bug, a bug flew in my mouth,” Charlotte began. “That’s how you get a stomach bug,” she concluded.

Another time, Charlotte asked, “What’s the bunny’s name in ‘Alice in Wonderland?’” She quickly answered her own question: “Tik Tok, right?” I’m sure some senior citizens might agree.

“Are those your new boots? Size 37T?” Charlotte asked me. This makes a ton of sense. Her clothes are usually sized near her age, so not a bad guess for mom.

However, my middle daughter Riley – age 3 – is making us laugh so hard we almost cry these days.

Out of nowhere and with no context, Riley recently asked, “Did someone say cookies?” No. But, now that you mention it, that sounds pretty good. What a genius way to get an unplanned treat.

One of our favorite Rileyisms is, “I’m not a baby anymore. I’m a tobbler!”

Lastly, there’s one phrase that will carry on in our house forever. Riley kept saying, “I look so side rich.” What’s side rich? My husband and I were at a loss until we finally realized what she meant. “Stylish.” It’s now commonplace to tell each other how “side rich” we look.

My daughters aren’t the only funny ones in this age group. Ava Fenton, age 4, called dirt “outdoor crumbs.” Ava is the daughter of longtime Severna Park native Greg Fenton. Greg and I grew up together. We made forts and played Ghostbusters and Ninja Turtles. I love seeing that his daughter is a chip off the funny block.

Millersville resident Tihamer “Tee” Toth-Fejel includes her kids’ toddlerisms in her annual holiday letter to siblings and friends. Here is a favorite Tee shared of her middle daughter, who they called their little sponge because she remembered everything:

“Once, when she was 5 years old, I was trying to explain to her why she had to do some very simple chore,” Tee explained.

Tee said to her daughter, “Look, chores have to be done. It's only logical. I know you're smart, so you can understand why everyone needs to do their chores.”

Her daughter answered, “No, I don't have to. I haven't reached the age of reason yet.”

In closing, make sure to look out when your kiddos finally say, “I’m a tobbler.” Sure, you’re entering roller coaster territory with toddler highs and lows. However, I can guarantee there will be plenty of laughs.